Do I sound like a broken record?

I'm in Africa. In Namibia, the unemployment rate is approximately 50%. Next week, I'll visit an orphanage that has over 45 children in a 4 bedroom home. So much poverty, sadness, disparity, and need.

And yet, even while being surrounded my other's desperate states, I'm selfishly struggling with continued frustration that I am still single.

I've had several people that I've met already, ask me if I'm in high school. No worries, I look young, I'll be glad about it later. Perhaps its because I look 16 that I'm told frequently "Emily, You are too young to be worried about not being married." Here's the thing: I'm 27 and have wanted to not be single for about about 4 years. Don't misunderstand me. I'm not obsessed about "the wedding". I could care less about that. And it's not about just having the title of being "married". I'd rather be single and 35, then married to the wrong person. I'm looking for God's best for me.

I pray for God's will to be done, that's my first desire. My second is to find a Man of God whom I can be a helpmate to, let God love through me, and be a reflection of God's love of the church with. However, I realize that God's will may not be for me to find that Man, and that's a harsh reality for me currently.

I sat next to a super-nice Australian woman, 29 years old, who runs a cattle farm in western Australia, with over 1400 head of cattle. She wasn't a Christian, but yet even she expressed the same frustrations I did about being the age we are and single, and wanting to be married, but only to the right one, not just anyone. So, I realize I'm not alone in this. Though, some days even that thought doesn't quite soften reality.

So, first, pray for God's will to be done. Second, Pray for the people of Africa, that they would know God. Third, pray that my heart would be tuned to HIS will, no matter what I want.

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This is me, unpacking all the "Christmas gifts" for mom and dad, after about 36 hours of travel... I crashed about one hour after this picture was taken....

When the world seems to shine, Like you've had too much wine, that's amore

"We're happier today than we were 6 months ago" -My dear friend Sarah, speaking on her 6-month wedding anniversary

February always makes me think of love. And no, not just because of a random date that Hallmark or Shoebox, or *Insert random name of Greeting Card company* picked in order to sell more merchandise. Nope, February makes me think of love, because I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for February love....uh, not that kind of love. (SHEESH! I WAS BORN IN MARCH FOLKS!) Let me re-phrase, I wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for my parents, meeting in February and FALLING IN LOVE.

My parents were set up on a blind date. I get different details every time I hear the story, but the gist of it was my mom's college roommate wanted to set my mom up with a friend of her boyfriend's. The evening came, and my mom refused to go. The roommate pleaded, He's downstairs waiting! You've got to come!, finally my mom gave in. They went on a 2nd date very shortly after. Apparently, my dad told my mom he was going to marry her on their 2nd date. {My dad denies this even today, however I am more prone to trust my mom's memory; my dad still runs through the whole list of his kids names and a random assortment of pet names before he gets to mine}

They met in February, got engaged in May, and were married August 30, 1969. I don't know if there is any such thing as "falling in love heritage" but I kind of like to think there is such a thing. So when every February rolls around I think, "this could be MY february;" I think no matter what month it happens it, it will happen fast, like my parents. Because when you know, you know. [or so I'm told]

38 years, 4 kids, 6 grandkids, 3-post-graduate-degrees, 20+ moves, and one parental death later, my parents are still married. Easy? I think they'd both agree heck no. Worth it? Most definitely yes. I asked my mom yesterday if they were happier today than when they got married 38 years ago. Her response: "Oh gosh yes, so much happier"

Hearing that makes me look forward to My February.

What not to say....

There are certain things that guys should just not say to a female unless he is purposely planning his certain demise. I've always assumed that these things were covered in "boy 101" but apparently there are still some remedial students out there. So, I thought I would help out said students by giving certain examples of what not to say/do. Note: i am not a guy-hater. I love guys. I plan to spend the rest of my life with a guy. My dad and my brother: both guys, and i love 'em. So take this with a grain of salt:

1. "Your perfume smells like my grandmother's soap" -- this comment was said in innocence by a gentleman, however I recommend NEVER comparing a female's ANYTHING to your grandmother. never. maybe it sounds good in your head, but once it leaves the lips it's a sure-fire shot to the foot.

2. "Whoa, I think you've got enough food there" said as the female takes 4 of 4 barbecue wing. you know, the mini-ones? No matter how confident a girl is, making a comment about how she's eating too much food will bring her self-confidence down about 4 notches. Not a good idea, even if you're joking, comments like this can never be taken the right way. I'm pretty sure there are bulimics and aneroxics out there that were pushed over the edge by comments like this.

3. Here's a "don't do": don't initiate e-mail/call/text/write a girl if you have no intentions of ever contacting her again. really. I know you probably have good intentions, but the girl will probably just take it the wrong way. That's something that you can't control, but that's just the way it is.

4. Don't call a girl "dude" or man" on a regular basis. The only time this is allowed is when you are trying to drive the point home that you are not interested. But for friends who are girls, do them a favor, and abstain from calling them any sort of "guy" nickname.

5. NEVER ask a girl if she likes sausage. This one i'll admit it happened to me. it was very random, very awkward, I didn't even know the guy that well. I think he regretted it after he said it, but at that point, it was too late, there's no recovering. And if you don't know what I mean by "liking sausage" too bad, because I'm not gonna be the one to tell you.

I'll admit, I've said some things i've regretted, created quite a few awkward moments (I've been sworn to never say the phrase "packin' heat" again), but girls are more sensitive than guys and that is a very important thing to remember my friend. (i.e. my one reader :) )

Mary Poppins Redone

You know that opening scene in Mary Poppins where they've put an ad in the paper for a nanny and all these women are lined up at their door waiting? Well, I have a feeling that someday I will come home to find that my mom has put an ad in the paper for me and instead of nannies in frumpy frocks I'll find business men in tailored tuxes and cowboys in denim dungarees. Not that I wouldn't mind for a couple of minutes meeting all those guys, but that's not the way you do it. My mom can't get it through her head that when God wants it to happen, it will. Let me give you an example of the daily struggle I go through with her: I went on one date months ago and made the mistake of letting my mom meet this guy. He was handsome, nice, successful, but their was no chemistry. However, my mom STILL talks about him, MONTHS later, and she has a way of sneaking him into every conversation: "Mom, what time is dinner?" -- "YOu know E., What's his name has the most beautiful eyes, when are you going to call him?" This conversation happens on a weekly basis! Sheesh.

Another friend bit the dust. Her wedding was beautiful, (short! Yeah!) and her husband is great, but with every wedding down, you think, "am i behind on the game?" so then you mentally go through all the single friends left, just to make you feel better that you're not the only one. What's really surreal is when friends start having MULTIPLE children. And I'm not talking started having kids in high school, no, friends who went through college and got married and started having kids. I have more than 1 friend in that situation. crazy.

the devil wears prada was enjoyable. Not an oscar winner, but i liked it. I would totally recommend it for the afternoon matinee or the student discount night. Adrien Grenier is HOT!

that's all, go italy!